the tiger in the flames
rose covered in His blood
His beloved daughter
I will never frown or cry over the past. I will smile...
because all these happened...& for good reasons too.
MUSIC will have to wait
[ok, I'm too lazy to search for songs, paste the player here + adjust the width & all. heh]
rae
0309'xx
mg->np_bfs
chc yl n329/e494♥♥♥ npfnpchoirnpvoices npcac npcim
♥God
♥family+friends
♥music+the arts
♥marital arts
♥books
♥life
♥colours
♥writing fiction
♥design
♥fashion
♥philo
my wishes...
l.o.v.e. <3 + peace
e latest gen ipod classic
new lappy, pref. mac book pro
own camera (DSLR/SLR preferred)
NEW PHONE(cos the current one sucks)
external speakers NEW SCHOOL BAG I got 2 new ones!!! :D HEADPHONES (pref. in-ear)TY J+N!
CDs
books
a dog =3
new clothes+bags
higher metabolic rate much better singing voice
learn dancing and improve on skills
improve martial art techniques
pick up new skills
have a start-up--business/club
have a more than decent gpa
friends--both old & new
a makeover (change is gd)
Sick still, coughing like a hell lot. Worries me that it could develop into a tumour if this continues. If i get that, i can't talk and i can't sing, i'll have to go for some throat operation and i won't know how i'm gna survive. sigh. Things aren't going too well in many aspects. This is the worst sem that I've had, and heck it's just the 3rd week. Imagine how the next... 17 weeks(?) are going to be like at this rate. I've been really really testy and jumpy for the past 1 week or so. Things aren't going so smoothly, & I've had a lot of talks with my kor & some closer friends. Thnx truckloads for the lurve & encouragement & understanding & care & advice!!! *Hardt Hardt Hardt* (LOL) I know you guys don't wanna see me hurt, but I will be strong. I will pull through this magnificently!
Rawr. I've been made VP of my cca (can't rmb whether i've blogged about it last time, but heck, yeah it's a reminder of sorts i guess). The comm had a meeting ytd afternoon, and we were all joking how we're like the Obama Administration trying to resuscitate the club after the "Bush Aministration" (no offence, to those concerned, yeah?). I was laughing and all, but deep down, I felt as though that we've taken on a much heavier burden than expected. We not only have to learn how to be a new comm, we need to revive the club and save it from the grave, no joke. (I srsly hope no one from my cca reads this =X) WE NEED TO BE HEROES, WHATCHA THINK ABOUT THAT? xDDDDD
& just 2 nights ago I had a premonition... an omen, or whatever you call it. I've only told like my kor about it, but yeah, I think i'll only tell it to a select few people. Cos I don't wanna scare the daylights out of everyone I know and care about. I hope it's not my mind playing tricks on me. It's scary, really, because it was a vision, and it felt very very real. Now's not a good time to think about it. Sigh. Ah yeah, just added new music to my collection. JET'S SHAKA ROCK!!! THAT GURL'S A GENIUS, OO-WHOA-OH-OH-OH-O-OH!!!
Haha pardon me, I'm trying to force myself to be high. & I need to complete my tuts too. k cya bb sayonara ciao zai jian nanananah heyheyhey goodbye~~~
I had a great/not so great Halloween. Citi FX Challenge--we didn't get into the finals, but it's ok. Argued with my partner, who ALMOST DIDN'T TURN UP FOR THE COMPETITION only did after my acad manager gave him a verbal lashing over the phone. IRRESPONSIBLE BASTARD. YOU ALMOST MADE MY DAD CRASH THE CAR ON THE WAY TO THE VENUE. IF MY DAD AND I GOT HOSPITALISED, OR IF WE DIED, WHAT D'YOU HAVE TO SAY TO THAT, HUH? HUH? HUH?!?!?!?!?! ok calm down, Rae. Calm down... Ok so yeah, after attempting to talk to him and managing to prevent myself from blowing up, I managed to meet up with Fels, Cass, Zhang Ming and his friend, Gina. Pastamania (Bugis Junction) for lunch, then we went to Iluma. It's very big and spacious, and quite cosy, with not so many people there atm. &&&&& I FOUND A STORE SELLING TOKIDOKI STUFF!!! *SCREAM!!!!!!!*
anw... went to svc (like after a super duper long time) & it felt great to see all of them again--well most of them, cos I didn't see a few people like May, MelKLim and Mel Tay, and LeGoh, and others if i missed out on any. But heck. It was still fun. We hardly dressed up, but we just hung out after to eat dinner and crap and catch up, esp on my part. Told some of them, including Josh T abt the Project, and he's quite thrilled to see it when it's done :D
Haha so yeah, nothing much happened other than that day. Still coughing like crap. It's like the 3rd week alr. >.< argh. can't stand it. I want to eat all my fave foods!!!! DDD:
Ok a lot of things have happened so far. I've helped to make NP a much smaller place! :DDDD by intro-ing a lot of my friends to each other... & i still want to expand my own social circle. Kor, Jawshee, Lizzles, Fels, Jyings, Chinese Lion... OFPF! xDDDDD (ok liz did kinda do that but not really anw LOL) && I'm getting damned stressed abt the pre-dialogue-with-minister session. The new head assigned me to do research on Law. Bloody Lor, Annoying Lor, Whatever Lor--the exact thing that will pull me down for my GPA and I'm expected to do some bloody research to present to those "smarty-pants" students next tues, so that we can prep those going for the dialogue what to ask the minister. %^#!#@%&*&#$@*&!*@*@&(*#^&* I'm the worst person to ask to do research for Law lah please. =.=
Competition's tmr (Citi Forex Challenge) & I'm ill-prepared. So is my partner, heck i doubt tht he even did a single bit of research. I at least read up on Forex, just no practice. Sigh. We are like so gonna screw up this competition. oh and what can I say, I'm so fucking disappointed in you. You've changed so much, almost 180 degrees in fact, and I don't recognise you anymore. I thought that I could tolerate you at least for a while, but this time will be the last straw. I had to let it out, so I called my Kor and I also talked to one of the J Triplets who happens to know the person concerned. I also told Jyings when I was hanging out with her at Ourspace ytd. She gave like really really good advice and reassurance, telling me some things that I never knew before--about myself and about relationships, with people in general, with friends and with God. Am so so glad to have her as a really good friend. Love you truckloads, dearie :) Which reminds me of something amazing that happened like night before last. That was the same night that i talked to Kor and one of the J Triplets tht i'm, uh, closer(?) to. I got so worked up that everything else got affected, and parents started screaming at me, making me even more frustrated and pissed at everything. So I tried to fall asleep, but couldn't. Insomnia and Rae hardly go together, y'know? well unless it's camp or chalet, but that's another thing altogether xD So ANW, I waited till everyone has gone to bed, then I went to do my own QT since I missed doing it earlier. I was just sitting there, staring into space, thoughts racing through my head and my blood close to boiling point, as I grabbed my Bible and opened it. When I looked down, I noticed that I had just opened straight to the first page of the book of Job. I was very amazed... I felt as though God was speaking directly to me, because I rmbed that MelKLim told me to read Job 1 & 2 to understand the test that God put for Job's faith, so that I know how to treat my trials and tribulations. & I didn't stop at chapter 2--I kept on going until 13, identifying with Job almost to a T and really understanding his 2 companions' advice to Job. I felt a lot more calm after that, then i prayed and went to lie down on my pillow, and as I closed my eyes, I smiled, since my eyelids felt heavier and not as terse. Thank you, Lord, I thought as I slipped into Slumberland. God is amazing, really :D
ahaha ok, I'm gonna jump all over the place, chronology-wise. Heh. Tuesday was the POS briefing in the afternoon after class and all. Bumped into Liz(zles) there with her friend Kenneth(? sry i can't rmb his name exactly. =X), && Liz & Josh, whom I had to reserve a seat for (hmph), clicked v well cos both of them were high in excessive levels. After the briefing, we went to makan place, where we bumped into Louis (ex-choir mate whom i haven't seen for ages). The 4 of us crapped non-stop, r/s conspiracies and all xD Liz did something that kinda shocked me, but I shall not type it out here. *wink wink @Liz *. Ok i shall split this up into 2 parts, will continue like when i have a chance in another post. In the meantime, gotta go for an appt.
~Ciao ciao
What doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger. :) Thank you, God, my beloved friends, and family for standing by me, and also to all the obstacles and people who disappoint me, you've helped me grow more. Thank you, once again. I love you.
Song: We Are Broken Artiste/Band: Paramore Album: Riot! (2007)
I am outside And I've been waiting for the sun With my wide eyes I've seen worlds that don't belong My mouth is dry with words I cannot verbalize Tell me why we live like this
Keep me safe inside Your arms like towers Tower over me
Yeah Cause we are broken What must we do to restore Our innocence And all the promise we adored Give us life again cause we just wanna be whole
Lock the doors Cause I'd like to capture this voice That came to me tonight So everyone will have a choice And under red lights I'll show myself it wasn't forged We're at war We live like this
Keep me safe inside Your arms like towers Tower over me
Cause we are broken What must we do to restore Our innocence And all the promise we adored Give us life again cause we just wanna be whole
Tower over me Tower over me ...and I'll take the truth at any cost.
Cause we are broken What must we do to restore Our innocence And all the promise we adored Give us life again cause we just wanna be whole ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ One of my all time faves from one of my all time fave bands *lub lub* that somehow really struck me more than before recently. Maybe cos it's a potential song for A Night... or it's the song itself... the melody or tune... the way the piano gives that melancholic vibe that really quietens your heart or the way Hayley Williams expresses all that emotion, regardless of whether she's belting or just quietly singing like a cry for mercy and forgiveness. Ah... maybe i'm just becoming emo.
It's the 2nd week of school and I'm very much unhappy with how things have been. Ikea for lunch with family and grandpa sans bro. Stuffed salmon with vege medallions and soup of the day (tomato soup) are like awesome, but the salmon tasted as though it could've been fresher and that it could've been smoked instead of... baked? lol Ah, the meatballs... unless u're a Muslim or a staunch Buddhist/Hindu, YOU MUST NOT LEAVE IKEA WITHOUT TRYING/BUYING BACK THE MEATBALLS!!! Hey hey I'm not being biased against any religion here, it's just that the (almost heavenly [lol]) meatballs are made of beef and pork. So yeah, it's no discriminating or whatever, just stating some facts. Dx The cream (?) sauce and the cranberry sauce which imo they put far too little in each serving just add that nice touch to the dish. I'm so gonna try the $1 hotdogs next time!!!! :DDDDDDD && the coffee/tea and soft drinks are like refillable for just $1 and $1.50 respectively. + shopping at IKEA just seems more fun than anywhere else that sells furniture/home furnishings. hahahahahahah Hey Ikea, you should just give me some commission for giving you free advertising! xD
I'm gonna be a really good girl now. Doing all my tutorials on time, asking questions, even talking to the tutors (love my acad manager :DDDD), and I shall go back home on time. Like now. LOL. ok shall stop like after I say a few things.
~stupid throat, get out of the sick-well-sick roller coaster ride. What have I done to make you hate me? Dx
Stop the fighting... stop the war...
What happened to those arms, that were like towers They made me broken. My heart can't stop crying; not even the sun can dry my tears I am broken. We are broken. I just want us to be whole.
School has started. Rawr! Not exactly an awesome start, but hopefully I can pull through. Hais I LOVE MLIA!!! loads of the ppl who post stuff there have very cool lives xD (ok i'm lazy to go through to the more awsm ones tht are on the previous pages) E.g: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Today, I asked both my parents what they'd do if I dragged a trash bag with a dead body through the house. My mom told me "Well anytime you drag something through the house, I'm gonna question you about it." My dad said "Well, I'd ask you who it is. If its someone I don't like, I'd drive you to the river." I love my family. MLIA
Two days ago, I rearraged the number keys on a lab computer at my school so that they read 0-9, instead of 1-9 and then 0. For the past two days the IT guy has been mystified as to why no one has been able to login on that computer. He was even more mystified when I could login perfecly. He still hasn't figured it out. I think I win. MLIA.
Today, my sister called me in the middle of class because she said she had something important to tell me. Luckily, my teacher was out making copies, so I told her to be quick. She had wanted to make sure I was aware that my birthday was also Bubble-Wrap Appreciation Day. I'm glad my sister knows what's important. MLIA ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ZOMG BUBBLE-WRAP! My dad also says that e-bubble wrap has no kick in bursting. MLIA haha and my comm member tells me there's WIRELESS ELECTRICITY in existence o.o she's super "on", always doing that extra bit more than everyone else (including myself, soon-to-be-ex head of the comm [well i don't think i can commit time in the first place])
Haha ok nvm. Mozilla Firefox and Seesmic Desktop are screwing up on me. && I've rediscovered the joys of Mad Libs and caricaturing situations! :DDDD MLIA
Enough with the MLIA, Rae. lol I'm so gonna be screwed for the forex competition. I haven't even started practice on fxcm. T-T
oh and i'll recap the past week. Monday was quite alright. While waiting for Kor, met Fel for her to pass my "pressie", and chatted with Hannah The Tall (aka China Lion), Fel's coursemate and Josh's fellow ninja, who also knows Esther. Yesh, NP is so bloody connected, it scares and annoys me a little xD Hung out with Kor [;)] after his BCOMM workshop, then our first comm meeting at 3+. I'm very happy with the comm in general
Tuesday... BCOMM workshop. ZOMG there are like 2 really huge cliques who are damn pally with each other. I have no idea how i'm gonna fit in. T_T && my tutor was Kor's BCOMM tutor last year. After tht, I went with Josh and Tricia to Marina Sq to para2, but before tht bumped into China Lion and Ilyana... then Josh & Hannah decided to do the scandal thingy tht they've been reserving for Hannah's friends LOLOLOLOL Fel, I hope you aren't scared =X anw at Marina Sq, we had Yoshinoya for lunch, after which we headed to the arcade to para2... where the gf whom Josh met on Saturday at the same place (which goes to show his *ahem* addiction to para2) and 2 of her friends were present. We took turns to para2 (well sorta). I've improved a lot from my first time. & that was my 3rd time para2-ing! :D Then we went back to school, and Josh and I decided to visit choir. Wanted to see Lao Shi but she didn't come. :( They're learning O Magnum, Take These Wings (tht was the first time i heard/sang that song) and Colours of the Wind in Chinese. I'm like a blur blob there x.x cos I haven't rly learnt most of these songs, 'cept the Chinese version, but I almost sang the English version throughout the song. =X
Wednesday... BCOMM tutorial from 9-11, then lecture from 2-4. so I was bored from 11 till 1 whikle waiting for Kor to come. NP LIB PRINTERS PHAIL! & I was scolded for printing double-sided cos I was using the only working printer available wtf?!?!? lol after lecture, I followed Kor to Popular and hung out at BTP for a while, then Macs to hang out some more while I got onigiri for tea xDDDDD love my Kor xD
sniffing, sore throat, urge to play more para2 even though i last played it on like... monday? i'm meeting xoxo rae & fels later then cac meeting (after much [i can't emphasise more on this word. sheesh] postponing on the exec comm's part =.=) at PS. Fwen, thnx for getting me hooked. not. xD
school's starting in... 4 days' timecrapcrapcrap... materials available on MeL are for bcomm only. WTH happened to all the other modules' notes and whatever?!?!?! && it peeves me that many people send me 1-word smses. I still need to get a new schoolbag cos the straps of my so-called previous schoolbag are really going to give way anytime soon. I haven't seen Mel for ages. Mel, if you're reading this, do sms me. We need to meet up soon.
ok i don't really have much to blog at the moment, but yeah, let's just say that I've been pissed a lot for the past few weeks. Com ban (I'm breaking it btw in secret =X) and grounding (heh) for like 2 weeks (now possibly extened to 3 weeks =.=) since last mon. want to gym but can't cos i'm sick. still trying to think up a new blog address but can't. my creative part of my brain died somewhere during the com ban. I feel dead in almost every aspect of my well-being. help.
